Ellen once asked me what my first memory of money was. Of course I did not answer her because as an artist and gender activist in the mire of being angry with capitalism and patriarchy, she might as well have asked me what my first memory of misogyny was. But I do hate being a cliché and it did seem strange that on paper my career looked shockingly successful compared to my balance sheet which was a boring composition of reds and minuses. We were both curious about this - enough to spend some time together - time which she might call coaching and work. I on the other hand, would rather call it love and healing. I never did tell her my first memory of money but my brain no longer links having fiscal health with the things I am opposed to in the world. My first memory of money is now clear to me and also the fact that it has always been with me, how it has come to me. Now it is easy to follow this path intentionally.